Shit Goalies

I just heard this term today. It used to be used by someone in our office to describe my profession, and I think it is an apt analogy. Let me explain:

I work in PR and am basically a publicist for electronics and technology products. Companies (my clients) pay me, amongst other things, to garner (positive) publicity for their products and brand(s). There's a lot more to it, but the above description covers a lot of what I do.

Why is that a shit goalie? Well think of my client as the goal. Think of me as the goalie. Think of the outside world as trying to throw shit in there. It's my job to block it, by any ethical means necessary. If I have to use my face to block a nasty bout of diarrhea being thrown at us, then I'll take one for the team and get a reverse runny nose. Sometimes shit gets through, and a bad article gets published, but for the most part, we stay on the ball and make sure it’s the shiny happy stuff you read.

No, I can't lie or steal, but cheating is allowed sometimes, as long as it falls somewhere in the grey zone (and you can't get caught).

So what does this really mean? A client puts out a bad product: bury it under the rug with our mystical spin-doctoring ways. A client seemingly forgets to change the packaging on its product and customers have to pay an extra couple hundred bucks or so: bury it under the rug. I wish I could link to a couple articles on that one, talk about dodging a bullet and a couple class action lawsuits...

The good news for us shit goalies is that shit is water soluble and it cleans off easily. So don't worry about me (I know you were). I can go home, take a shower and all will be good until the next day, when I start over again. However, next time you see a bright shiny image of the latest and greatest gadget out there, right next to a glowing right-up and an editor splooging all over it in glorious copy, know there was a shit goalie making 'it happen.